Communication, Communication, Communication

"As you can see our job is not done, our job just started, teen age children need as much love and support as toddlers do." ~ Beta Metani'Marashi

A counselor by trade, I find that my knowledge and expertise produces little result with my own teen-aged daughter. My work with parents and conversations with friends proves I am not alone in this fiery ring of purgatory. 

"A great challenge for parents is how to prepare themselves for being successful in advising our children." ~ Eraldo Banovac

Most attempts at communication with my fifteen year old are a challenge and according to her, I have not been right about anything since her tenth birthday. As a result, I am constantly reminding myself that my daughter is a gift from the womb of the Creator's mind and it is there I must always return for guidance. 

"An ever-growing, ever-constant relationship with God makes us certain of what we believe and enables us to run with endurance." ~ Katy Kaufman

Walking the hot coals of the parenting path as part of my soul growth means at times, I must slow my pace and experience the heat of the lesson. Reflecting upon who I was at her age, and rediscovering any soil within me yet to be excavated or overturned and determining what each block in our mother daughter experience is attempting to teach me. 

When I do this, God never fails to hold up the mirror that is my little girl reflecting His wisdom back at me. As she challenges me, my only jobs are to trust Him and keep loving her. My good or bad "mommy ego" has nothing to do with what my daughter needs. 

The Creator reminds me that communicating with my daughter is threefold and starts with seeking clarity of, in, and through Him.  He knows the mothering my daughter needs most and He knows the places within me, her mother, needing yet to be healed. 

As I rely upon this wisdom, He is communicating to and through us both.

"... you are my rainbow to keep. My eyes will always be watching you; never will I lose sight of you." ~ Vesna Bailey

Have you been communicating with your children through your "mommy ego"?
Are you allowing the Creator to speak to you through your children?
What lessons are you learning as you walk the hot coals of your parenting path?

The Plurality of You

"And I went into the new year loving myself a little less, but a little more where it actually mattered." 
~ Dominic Riccitello

Sometimes the simplest observations of truth presented in each moment can be the most profound. 

In standard English, you is both singular and plural. My second grade teacher told us when you point a finger at someone there are three fingers pointing back at you. The plurality of you in personal interactions must be examined be it business or personal.

"You have to learn how to deal with the truth right in front of you. No morphing. No sugar coating. Just deal with it." ~ My Sister

When you believe someone has misled you, before holding them accountable for all the hurt, anger, and disappointment they may have caused, consider the ways you have lied to yourself. It was you who wanted to believe them so much you overlooked the subtleties within their words and actions toward you and you kept on believing them well after it no longer felt like the truth.  

Why?

The common denominator and definer of truth in each experience you encounter and endure is you. Whether someone deals well with you or not, separating real truths from imagined ones is your responsibility to you. Scapegoating another with your refusal to do this serves no one, you least of all.

This year, begin anew by living in truth as best you can. Love and honor you as best you can.

"The more clearly you understand yourself and your emotions, the more you become a lover of what is." ~ Baruch Spinoza

What does the truth feel like to you in word and deed?
Will you ask three self-directed questions when you believe you have been lied to or misled?
Do you fear what those three questions will reveal to you about you?