Own The Power of Saying No

"It takes effort to say no when our heart and brains and guts and, most important, pride are yearning to say yes. Practice." ~ Cole Harmonson

My mother came to live with me awhile following the birth of my daughter. Amidst her careful instruction in diaper changing, nursing, bathing, and burping the one lesson she reinforced was mastery in the art of saying no. "Stand at the mirror and practice every possible way to deliver the news. Trust me it is a necessity in parenting," she admonished. 

Not only is owning the power of your no necessary in parenting, it is vital to the preservation and self care of our inner most being.

"Always remember: you have a right to say no without having to explain yourself. Be at peace with your decisions." ~ Stephanie Lahart

In his book, The Four Agreements, Don Miquel Ruiz, advises we honor ourselves and others by learning to be impeccable with our word. Agreeing to or accepting circumstances in our lives that meet the needs of others before serving our own inner peace is a betrayal of self and those we give a false sense of security through our less than straight forward communications. 

We are to use the power of our words in the direction of truth and love and honoring our no is a healthy way of maintaining boundaries and teaching others how we would like to be treated. 

Mind you, having been born a fire sign translates to my seldom being at a loss when it comes to expressing my truth and those close to me might agree my issue falls in the areas of tact and tone.

"Tone is the hardest part of saying no." ~ Jonathan Price

Intention is everything. A no can hurt and should never be used as a weapon designed to injure the spirit of a fellow traveler nor should it be withheld out of fear. Though sometimes it may be tempting to entertain the ego self by wearing the mask of false martyrdom, this only stalls the inevitable bad news until we can no longer endure the weight of an insincere yes. 

So commit to kindness as best you can starting with yourself. We must seek to communicate with love and learning to accept disappointing news with grace is an invaluable life skill.

Know that saying yes is not always possible and that no is a complete sentence. Honor your being and the hearts of others by learning to deliver your words impeccably with love.

How often do you dishonor yourself by saying yes when you mean no?

What keeps you from owning the power of your no?
Are you carrying burdens today saying no can release you from?

"No is a complete sentence and so often we forget that. When we don't want to do something we can simply smile and say no." ~ Susan Gregg